you still trying to smash that chick?
it's a losing battle and she kinda sucks. been busy with school so not getting midweek drunk - she's nearly unbearable sober
I just had to sit down with an 11 year old who threatened to dick slap a girl.
would it be inappropriate to describe you with the phrase "bigass titties"?
i get tired of guys telling me there married or they have a girlfriend. they act like it concerns or matters to me
New Jersey isn't a real state, it's just a myth you tell little kids to scare them like Canada or Carrot Top
You came on your own forehead. Just wanted to remind you that.
i was mowing the lawn and found the coffee pot in the bushes
If he thought that flying across an ocean to visit me in London constituted sex, he thought wrong.
He tied my whole arm, in its cast, to the headboard first. He mumbled something about safe, sane, and consensual?
Yes. I am getting trashed on an open tab while judging a karoke competition
Impressive. I approve.
If is anything like my past relationships, I have no doubt that I will single-handedly reignite the Cold War
there's no way I could forget finding someone else's hand in my pants
I'm like a sensual ninja. You turn your head for a second and.... BOOM I'm naked. It's like a naughty magic trick.
We're just starting to open presents and I already need a shot. This is gonna be a long Christmas day.
Straight boys are literally imbeciles. If Darwinism doesn’t get them female rage will.
Randomize
