love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
My Higher Power is John Stamos
I would do things to you that would get us burned at the stake if we lived in a puritan village.
Just got a script for 120 vicodin with 6 refills. I feel like michael jackson.
I could make treat bags
Going to get a "plan B"urrito
After all the hair products he's stolen from me, he better fucking be gay.
I'm sorry i ruined our friendship with a boner
i was completely deserted.. so i stood outside starbucks for 20 minutes trying to convince the employees to open early and take care of me.. fuck you guys
I dont think ive ever had a drunk day betray me so hard before
I think we did. All i know my pants smell like pong water due to the bathroom extravagansa. God I feel like a whore.
I think I was the only one who knew you were acting like you weren't drunk in public issues discussion this morning. Make sure you thank me in your Academy Award Speech someday.
I thought it was pretty weird, but after the marinating loins thing, i figured i'd roll with it.
Nothing like a little " am I gonna shit myself " to spice up the work day
I just got a snapchat of a flaccid penis with the caption "happy belated valentine's day." What did I do to deserve this
I climbed to the top of a stripper pole and touched the ceiling. Accomplishment?
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