I think getting shot is the thing to do in Brooklyn
Oh and ps....i was sleeping soundly until i woke up by the sound of amy on the phone with her mom sobbing hysterically because she can't stop having the shits.
kindergarten is hard when you're hung over.
They're sharing a mixed drink at a bar with straws...its like a disney movie with booze
he made a bald eagle out of coke lines
You know the party was great when the birthday girl gets arrested
Just got back from fathers day breakfast. So hungover i couldn't eat so i just slipped my food in my pockets and threw it out while i puked in the bathroom.
Wow just saw this. Nothing like a little anal sex to ring in 2012.
And now she's hand feeding me pork rines and showing me her angry birds high scores. This is Vegas.
Way to ruin everything
I am drinking jager with a cat, your argument is invalid
earned some solid air miles from the plan B I just bought. #silverlinings
Dear sober self, your keys are on the table in front of you the only way your typing this is with autocorrect goodnight love you
I think him and kristen are pretty serious now.. I dont think he cheats on her, anymore.
the woman that waxes my lady parts just hugged me...
were you wearing pants?
no.
She said she didn't care that I was gay and wants to ride the fucking rainbow
You kept crying and I couldnt help but laugh at you, I was really high though.
Randomize
