hungover + watching bobsledding = i just puked
it looked like a condom graveyard when i woke up. they were everywhere
obviously my correlation between being a pro surfer and being extremely good in bed was 100% wrong.
It's official, I've know hooked up with everyone I carpooled with in middle school
They were greeting people getting off the 48 with green beers and cheers. The one day I decide not to take the bus home...
scarred for life. way too high and witnessed some chick give a dude head on the dance floor
Want to get together for a boner voyage before you leave?
its really sad that i have to specifically make this a rule but, absolutely no lighting smoke bombs indoors at my birthday party.
Concert was great. Tackled the lead singer. Met him afterwards. He was cool about it.
I don't remember because I was drunk out of my mind, but I have it on good authority that weed cinnamon buns at 3 in the morning with chocolate milk are better than sex.
Who ever is in the stall next to me is crying and it sounds like they're doing massive amounts of blow too. Finals for your ass huh.
My body is like , remember when you wouldn't let me puke last night? Good luck at work fucker.
He chose me to be his birthday sex..theres a lot of pressure riding on this bang
I get so sad when I watch him slowly destroy his life with whiskey and cocaine. Then he bites my neck and I just want to fuck him. I can't help it.
What can I say, like your penis. The fact that I like the person attached to it helps too
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