i'm sorry, i thought "hey, she wants TO FUCK YOU" was a good enough cue
True. She actually gives a fuck. A quality looked down upon if she wants to be one of us
There are going to be so many Snookis this Halloween that I might just dress as the guy that hit her and punch them all in the face
when i'm drunk i think im just gonna point at him and yell adultery is a sinnnn. youre going to helllll
he might be the rich husband I pretend to love for the rest of my life!!!!
That's all? I'm a pro at gay chicken. I'll touch his dick, I have no problem with that.
I am eating deep fried cinnamon rolls and I found a lighter in my sprinkles. I miss you.
HE'S BRINGING FRIED MAC AND CHEESE BITES. I GET FRIED MAC AND CHEESE AND SEX PEOPLE. BEST WEDNESDAY EVER.
I think I may be the only girl in the world that can say she has fallen asleep grasping a penis..... 3 different times...... 3 different penises
It's not safe here. I had urgent and violent diarrhea last night, and I got blackout drunk. Please don't come over.
You pretended to be Borat in that weird slingshot bathing suit and then proceeded to send another dick pic/nude selfie and said you weren't naked because you were wearing a hat.
Now with the essential back story, I can empathize. Sorry about your beer and butthole.
now to finish some work and then i think i'll work out. or garden. or at the very least I'll continue eating frozen grapes and take more drugs
I tried to get the guy I like to “spit shake” on a sexual bet... why am I such a bro fml
I’m a little confused...we were told by Cheeto Jesus and his minions multiple times that we would stop hearing about coronavirus the day after the election and, yet, I am still hearing about coronavirus. Is it possible they lied to us again?!?
Randomize