omg kevin jonas gave his bride a glass slipper..could he be any gayer then he is now
he is so gay. he makes clay aiken look straight. what is wrong with the lady that married him? kevin must be envious of her balls
I sold 10 pepperonis for 5 dollars last night....i fucking love drunk people
And then i had a penis in each hand. It was magical.
We've done the math and the dogs tails are wagging at a rate of 3000 wags per hour. Stoned.
Side note: I think I fell asleep holding a cereal box
It involved anal and pop rocks. Tell me how that could have ended well.
the gays at disneyland are vicious
Not sure I just ate a really big pot brownie, I feel like my future is uncertain
not totally sure where im at but i think i've definitely woken up on this couch before. bong on the coffee table looks familiar. should be able to find my way home
Tommarow we shall sacrifice the freshmen to the sun god
I guess, all I remember was giving you road head the whole way there so you wouldn't fall asleep.
You're not drunk til you wake your roommates up screaming at your ceiling fan
My serious response to your Cathy tattoo inquiry- Do you ever want to get laid by someone not wearing a Blossom style bucket hat? Tattoo accordingly.
I'm fucking a man old enough to be my father who is also dating my boss. What have you done with your life?
so i EARNED it!?! i EARNED dying alone with cats!!?
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