Have fun fixing the bed from last night Bob Villa.
At least you didn't call me Brittany this time
AIM automatically accepts video chats on my laptop. I found this out when I got a text from Jacob after my first attempt at drunk lesbian sex saying, "I'd give it a 7. You need to work on your positioning." I think I'm single now.
You were running around with scissors offering people free haircuts.
She even gives head with a lisp.
I was chocking and even did the sign for it..And you continued to just laugh
But I love Penises too much to give up on them. My phone capitalized Penises. It's like it knows I respect them
This is your morning news. Today at 5 pm I will be going out of town until the 29th. If you would like some great sex before I leave, please contact me. The available packages are: a house call, an outdoor excursion, or a delivery style in-car quickie. available only while supplies last.
They ran out of ice at the party, so I fixed my drink with frozen broccoli....the show must go on!
I went back to the party but by then they were all sitting on the floor in the dark listening to we are the champions on full blast.
Her boobs felt like beanie babies from heaven
Yeah its great. Whenever we want a new bowl we hand it to Trevor and he clears it in one hit. Definitely one of the benefits to having a swimmer in your circle.
We're taking a shot every time Landon Donovan takes a shot. It's clever, sort of.
I tried to help you up but you said "let me dance it off"
he was almost the father of your baby, you should let him take you to dinner
I hope you have your own chainsaw cause I didn’t buy one for you. It was a gross oversight on my part
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