Dude she looked like Jerry Garcia's knuckles
well it doesn't count as a walk of shame if he drops you off at your class in his golf cart
I don't know if you realize how depressing it is to get your card denied....when you're only spending $4.
Is it wrong that I didn't stop masterbating when the credit card company called?
did you answer or finish?
both
I REALLY appreciate you guys taking care of me when im wasted but i think its weird when i wake up in different clothes than black out in
You just kept rubbing her head and repeating "I really like your head, I want your head..." over and over for like 10 minutes straight... And she didnt even stop you.
Apparently I climbed into a dryer last night and refused to leave... There are pictures to prove it
All he was doing was sitting in the car, staring. We asked him what was wrong and he just turned, smiled, and said "everything has its own pair of boots"
Honestly I'm so excited to go to bed I feel as if I don't deserve to be in my early twenties.
I'm home alone drinking wine, so high, scrubbing my house down... This is what my thirsty thursday has become
I forgot that places existed where drinking on Sunday is frowned upon. It's just so unreasonable.
I believe the question is can one ever have too many vibrators?
Alright if I email the police department asking for my mug shot do you think they will email it to me
You just kept telling everyone to call you MFT.. Mother Fucking Tornado.
YOU'D BE LIKE A MERMAID! I'll bring you coffee filters to cover your tits.
Randomize
