I just saw someone marching around outside wearing only a loincloth, dragging a fuckton of sheet metal. Spring has Sprung.
While at warped tour today a girl was crowd surfing and her vagina landed in my face, I call that a successfull day.
The police scanner is talking about you again....
She climbed through the window and into my bed. Not even sure who she is. Was thinking she might be a friend of yours?
Our logic class started an hour ago, I walked out and found my sister drunk, sitting down, eating m&ms, afraid to walk in... I want her life
I've been timing it. He's been showering alone for 33 minutes. 4 minutes ago, he said "truth or dare." haven't heard anything since.
I rolled out of the car, crawled on all fours to the door, did somersaults all the way to my room, and then I ran across the parking lot to tell our neighbor you wanted to bang him. I'm not even sure if it was the right guy.
I'm sure it's not the worst thing to ever come out of my ass
this st patricks day sucks
ill send jameson via bank tube 150+ miles
Far too many of our conversations end in us talking about sperm
PLEASE HELP ME THE AMERICANS ARE YELLING ABOUT TURKEY, I DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO
Last night was just a whirlwind of Mario Brothers and sex.
just move with us, we wanted to get a dog. youre kind of the same thing..
Made it to my hair appointment on time, and got some dick. Today is already a great day
The only food I have to eat is weed gummies and magic mushrooms... This is peak 34
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