wouldn't it be funny if when girls shaved their vaginas, they gave them sideburns?
New boss looks like john cusack in a collar. Hot. Why do i always want to have sex with priests?
thank god random hookups don't end with college. happy birthday, america.
Sober January is a disaster.
Get everyone out of their dorms and watch 3 girls do the walk of shame from my room.
Idgaf if he's a manwhore, he's like the mt. everest of penises. howcan I NOT try to put that inside me?
she sent me pictures of 3 different vaginas and if I could pick which one was hers i could sleep with her.
I was always good at matching as a child.
Me and him were fist fighting in the back of the cab and I offered the driver a 100% tip to call him an asshole. I don't know why.
I just singed the hair in my nose trying to re-light a joint. now all i can smell is burnt hair. day ruiner
Just got a 15 minute lecture from a drag queen about how bisexuality doesn't exist. Cher would be so disappointed in her.
Haha never eat brownies from a guy with batman pajamas
You had sex with him AND his man bun. Like not just him but also the bun.
Well it might’ve been because you asked to play What Makes You Beautiful at the club
Can I get my morals surgically removed?
I guess I'm famous. Hot lesbian was WARNED about me. Still hooked up with her.
I'll pay you to teach me.
Randomize