Going to get tested monday. You're coming with. Bonding time, slut style.
Yah, I definitely wouldn't wanna be fingered with a fake arm...
I just pulled a handful of rice out of my pocket.
He shoved his balls through an egg carton and showed us a picture. They were surprisingly egg-like.
What the fuck could you be doing in that room to make her yell "Beginners Luck!" over and over again?
I fucked her wearing an American flag. Now here I am, awake, naked, and flag less. How do I report this to the police?
Did u smell a guys dreadlocks in the McDonald's drive thru line last night or did I dream that?
Pretty sure that propositioning you to fly across the country for sex fest '13 isn't something my husband would approve of.
I fell asleep completely naked, standing up with my arms and head in the freezer
I got so drunk last night I took a ice bath with my mother in law
my god I love twenty year old dicks
Babe, Have you see my pants?
Try Jay street in Brooklyn.. that's where I last remember seeing them.
I saw the president of my women in business club at the bar last night...I was gonna thank her for teaching me the business skills to create my own fake to get in... then i decided not
Alcohol and I aren't friends right now.
I have a dinner date combo blowjob event with Tristan tonight.
Randomize
