So she couldn't stop dragging her teeth while she was blowing me.
Ahh dude, that fucking sucks, what'd you do about it?
Decided to drag my teeth while eating her out... She got the point.
and on the seventh day, God created megan fox
Waaait I'm alsleep in myt car somewhere
you just can't say no to drugs on a mirrored table.
Not only did I hold your hair back as you puked, i french braided it. I am such a great friend.
We were walking home when he passed out, we left him. Just got a call from him, hes in a jail in Canada.
my new ipod has external speakers and a video camera...all i can think about is how much more convenient it would be for me to make a pretty decent sex tape
2000 dollars has been put in for bail money. Also we're signing contracts
I think you would be disgusted with me if you knew how many times I had imaginary sex with you today
She was horrified when I asked if they had any strap on chin dildos, I was at a sex shop for gods sake must I be judged everywhere
We split an eighth of shrooms and went ice fishing. It didn't get weird until I caught one and we both started crying.
doing squats while I brush my teeth.. gotta keep the booty in check
Shaving your balls drunk sounds like a good idea untill you do it
just woke up and had to check if i still had pants on, i really need to stop drinking
He sounds like Chris Tucker and wants to eat me out when I’m on my period. If that isn’t love I don’t know what is.
Randomize
