Ps if we're still living vicariously through each other, you had sex on a beach last night
Found her in the closet eating mayo out of the jar with a knife
she was passed out on the moving sidewalks in the airport, we NEED to travel more often
...i'd have to set their sheets on fire.
I deem her datable let the dance of attraction commence
Sad Megan is Sad
Have you been drinking my beer?
Holy shit there is too much Taco Bell here to talk to you
sex in a hospital.. check
Moral of the story: I had sex to Back to the Future last night.
Life without a bra equals bliss.
Not sure when or why this happened but I just stopped giving a shit about everything
Almost lost a vagina lip in the great shave of '16
I think I broke my toilet with my head. There are ceramic pieces everywhere. and I might still be drunk.
in mid sex he pointed out my great gatsby tattoo and we started discussing themes and metaphors from our fave fitzgerald novels
you need to stop fucking English majors
That sounds good. I'd totally blow you somewhere quick but im not in the frame of mind to think of a place
Be outside in 5
Randomize
