I think I just got seasick
you're not on a boat
he has a waterbed.
She just got back from rehab. You dont celebrate that with margaritas.
can you imagine how much money lesbians save on birth control?!?
bitches.
hes a good boy he deserves a good blow
Yea. I think between making the bride puke, feeling up the maid of honor, and sleeping with a bridesmaid. I did my part.
Gay TA. Finally going to boost my GPA your way.
I just used 'come play with my balls' as a legitimate booty call attempt. And it worked.
Why does it always end up with me crying in my car.
Get caught with marijuana. Cop takes piece. Buy new bong. Circle of fun.
you stumbled up the stairs in your heels, pulled 23 one-dollar bills out of your bra and then went and puked in the toilet. didnt say a single thing to me the whole time
I gotta say, I do way better with the ladies than I do the men. So if it turns out being gay is a choice, then I'm going to go ahead and choose it.
I think I may have some undocumented and undiscovered std that causes girls to go bat shit crazy. How you got it is beyond me
Having boobs is probably the greatest thing in the world, free booze all around
I can't help that I bring out the sex in people
He put his burrito in the bag with his dildo.
Randomize
