I dont shave on purpose to keep myself from being slutastic!! it usually works
awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
It's like a parade of train wrecks.
Not a single person will look me in the eye. Last night must've been bad.
Am I the only one creeped out by the guy asleep behind our couch?
hes like the used car salesman of hook ups and closed the deal w my taking him home with me,as is,today
The intern claims someone glued plastic eyeballs to his penis last night. He going to show everyone in the conference room at 3pm. There is a $5 cover charge.
He just texted me asking if I remember pinching his eyelid shut with my eyelash curler.
Last thing I remember is beer bonging sangria. Dear God.
My penis just literally said "Yaaaaaay!!!" It's the first time it's spoken out loud. Before this we could only communicate through rudimentary sign language
Strip clubs just aren't as fun when a man tries to drunkenly grind on you.
Don't forget the part about the bar bathroom stumbles.
Oh damn, you're right. I have to include that. You turned off all the lights with your head. That was impressive.
When I came out of the bathroom you were naked dead asleep on the couch but your dick was still rock hard standing straight up. I almost took a pic. It was impressive.
And then there was cum in my hair and he was making beans.
Dude. Don't do acid and go to Disney on ice. Hear my warnings. That snow monster will fuck your shit up.
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