I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
I haven't shaved so I have to behave myself. I'm going to do this from now on.
soooo.. i guess the cop said he'd drop the charges if i go to some AA meetings and i said fuck AA. not one of my better choices.
sorry i interrupted the heart to heart you were having with your bathrobe last night
A cab driver remembered me by name, address, and ex fuck buddys nick name from a year ago. I mustve been one memorable shit show.
Also...you were trying to touch his balls without him noticing
No matter what you may say to me. You will still be the guy that managed to get his own cum in his hair.
He had a beer bottle in each of his back pockets and was on rollerblades. All I remember is following him for about 10 minutes
Just saw out breathalyzer tubes from last night on the side of the road. Glad the cop let us know that they are biodegradable
Is the booze for tonight or the apocalypse?
Both. Pregaming the zombie party and hurricane sustenance.
I just remember lots of butts and something about ranch dressing.
she doesn't even know what year it is. She just stumbles around life with a bottle of rum
drunk and crying about Shakespeare- how's your night?
You took acid last night and I’m up early to go to the grand opening of a new TJMaxx by my house. We couldn’t be more perfect.
I'm praying to the gods of sex we both get laid this weekend. Amen. Love you
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