some girl that im facebook friends with has H1N1, im scared to even go to her facebook page
Professor used "ROFL" while grading my paper... Do I even go to a real college?
The beer-amid has reached five feet. Caitlyn has a taser. GTG
I wish! That ended in 2001 when we all got collectively band from the Settle Inn. As a group we are also band from social events at the zoo. It's impressive really.
Last night I had sex with one of the groomsmen I was in the wedding with. In a stairwell. 13 years my senior. Thinking I should retire from the bridesmaid gig.
Oh hey. I left my beer there. Beer is more important than my pride. I want to pick that up.
Someone younger than me just got married. Send help and vodka
Blacking out is all I've done this year and we're only 3 days in. Checkmate bitch.
If we all have the time, and the weather permits, and you have no plans, we should have another go at Operation Get Our Carless Friends Laid. All the lonely people will be out. We can take our lonely people out too.
5 minutes Isn't even long enough to bring me even close to an orgasm. How selfish. Think about baseball and fuck me you idiot.
moral of my life: don't tell a guy you want to have sex with him. he'll get back together with his ex.
He left weed in my bong for me this morning. What a guy.
You know it's been a rough week when you funnel beers by yourself.
I wear drunk well.
The same idiot-bubble, now just bigger and louder.
Randomize
