The irony of calling it Pride is that you do things that no one should be proud of.
We should probably just have a threeway and get everyone on the same page.
I woke up to him eating me out, listening to classical music.
We removed her tutu and her cape, so there's no risk of her strangling herself.
I wonder if that one guy remembers you sticking salami to his forehead when he was passed out on new years eve.
Her exstacy made her nickname everyone David. Nobody knows who the fuck she's talking to so we just say no to everything she says. She's crying.
Ive yelled into your vagina. There are few lines we haven't crossed at this point.
She's clinging to me like a horny koala.
ill give you the fast version. Hooked up with 17 year old coworker while housestting for my boss
This girl is wasted dancing to The Final Countdown. She's grinding on a guy who came to the bar in a track jacket and a wife beater
you know it was a successful halloween when you wake up and have a firecracker in your tits
He offered to take me to my appointment after breakfast then kind of just sat there and watched me get a papsmier. Most awkward first date ever.
Seriously? People are paying $45 for Surge?!? I've seen better one night stand decisions being made then the choices being made on amazon orders of Surge
Hey bro are you still alive??? I'm sure you are wondering how you ended up laying on the floor at the foot of your bed and why there is a wheelchair by your door....
Well when you come back we can have a huge bitch fit...or get really drunk....whichever comes first
Randomize
