no, I didn't make it. Instead, i watched VH1 for... 13 hours? I use the question mark because I was using Flavor Flav's clocks to tell time after the first 3 hours.
Theyr drawing diagrams to try to explain to me how high they are
now I know why they wanted me to come. apparently gay guys are stripper magnets
I had some like war flashbacks of giving someone a handjob and i was trying to figure out who it was.
josh has a chalupa in his pocket if you're hungry.
Apparently, I showed up wrapped in caution tape and immediately jumped on the stripper pole and started making very sexual gestures at the birthday girl. We lasted ten minutes.
you tried to fill your inhaler with vodka
Pretty sure I was high. I thought there was music coming out of my makeup bag.
It's snowing in May and there was a law school party at the strip club. The end is near.
like, you weren't just lying there, you were wrapped in what appeared to be the skin of a wolf, chanting doomsday prophecies
THE END IS NEIGH
I'll give you one guess. It has a cock and I want it
Please don't give away my fajitas
I sent my brother over to my ex's to get the rest of my stuff. He comes back SEVEN HOURS LATER, high as fuck without my shit! No loyalty.
He showed up in a Prius. I didn’t even wanna.... So I left.
How’d it go?
I accidentally joined a cult
So not great...
Randomize
