u know ur drinking tonight lol i dont know why you try to deny it
but i dont wanna get emotional and drunk text
then give me ur phone
NEVER!!
all of your clothes are in the front law. btw..sprinklers go on in 20 minutes
I need a DD tuesday morning around 9 AM
I'm scared to ask why.....
1st bikini wax. Jose Cuervo is helping me prepare.
I wish his dick was as long as his hair.
when i went to the store to buy my pregnancy test they were giving carnations to all the moms and they gave me one and said "just in case"
Oh my gosh they are following me around the bar
Blow your rape whistle
If a hot cougar texts u and says "back massage, blow job".... you show the fuck up.
omg i just made best friends with a deer. Im like the drunk santa clause.
Remember when there was a happier time when people could all hang out together with out the awkwardness of the fact that she stole $1000 and cheated on a brother with another brother !?!??
Does he cat effect his dick pics to you? Because THAT is true love
She frightens me and turns me on at the same time. She's a keeper
Restraining order pending?
her tits were more amazing then brown bears with armor and guns that fire bullets of Justice that destroys inequality.
The funny thing is, we kinda did bring guys home cause you had a fort...
WHAT IS MY LIFE THAT THE ONLY PERSON INTERESTED IN FUCKING ME IS MY 6TH GRADE MATH TEACHER
I'm torn between regretting everything and regretting nothing.
Randomize