I think she would actually eat a penis if anyone was brave enough to let one near her mouth
Do you realize that we tried to rent a limo at 5am to come and take us to waffle house?
Why do my balls have what looks like rust on them?
There's a difference between southern and inbred. She just doesn't know that yet.
Hypothetical question: If a guy wanted to watch you fuck me, would you be willing to take a long lunch break on Wednesday?
Went to the strip club with my aunt. Do you know how hard it is to be a pervert in front of your female family members?
Why i have shady connections. Owner just txt me asking to come by and judge the new stripper.
I'm an approx 70% certain someone switched my UV Blue for Windex - just as volatile as you might think.
I will kick you in all of your body parts. All at once.
I'm eating hummus off of my stomach right now.
just woke up. hair smells like weed and bbq. shins are bruised. vague memory of us chasing deer at the park at 3 am. fill me in on what exactly happened.
I'm excited for you as you venture towards new drug experiences
I mean, if there was a version of you with a penis, you'd fuck it...right? Like just outta curiosity at least
ps. i have two very important words to sum up my night
which are?
library sex.
It was all like "my feathers evolved from scales of a reptile bitches!!" and I was all like "damn this chocolate milk is AWW SOOME!"
Randomize
