There was a lot of him and a little penis
pretty sure i had my hand down BOTH their pants at the same time at some point...
Dude she threw his clothes out n 8th floor window and her dog tried to bite his dick off. So the answer is yes it could be worse...
Vaginas creep me out. I'm disgusted by the look of them. I wonder if this is what having an ugly baby is like: you have to take care of it and love it but it just hurts you on the inside to look at it.
Hey girl, do you remember you made me brush your hair with a plastic fork on Saturday night?
Last night did I take a piece of pizza out of your hand and then proceed to eat it?
Twice...
Why is there a muffler in the livingroom?
First, I just want to say that I had nothing to do with it. Second, how good is your car insurance?
A dick pic is not a proper way to say I'm sorry
How was your night?
I spent a lot of money and drank a lot of booze. Also was part of a successful search party
These guys are just fucking with my heart instead of fucking me. They're fucking up.
He showed up to my apt at 6am wearing a suit and holding a bag of coke....how could I not let him in?
I don't know where you went, but if you're anywhere near the liquor, pour me another drink
Regardless I WANT TO BE YOUR SEX DISPENSARY. that is like the career I was born for.
He doesn't understand the concept of a strip club. He keeps falling in love
Look, if it comes down to it, I’m spraying whipped cream on your nuts
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