she was so hung over that i had to hold her hair while she puked in a trash can in the middle of the student center as new freshman and their parents walked by.
I went for the touchdown every play, and I think I ended up with herpes.
i regret nothing . he quoted dr. suess . he deserved that bj .
Any questions about why there was a scuba tank chilling in the hot tub this morning?
Also I may have a condom stuck inside me, but I won`t know til I check the couch coushions.
all I remember is repeatedly winking at the fire marshall while he was counting the people in the bar
ALL CAPS CUZ ITS SERIOUS SHAME.
The problem with never associating with your roommate is that you never know if they're dead in their room with the door closed or just gone for the weekend...I sprayed some febreeze just in case.
I replaced his Viagra pills with sleeping pills.
Living room floor. I asked him to give me a back rub. He did. And smoothly transitioned that to foreplay, then basically threw me on the floor. My vagina hurts. He deserves another Christmas present.
Well I was kicked out of the bar and woke up on a picnic table. I'd say the night was awesome!
It's cool dude. The dank is in the form of premade smores with honey grahm crackers, marshmallow cream and 420 brand choc. bars. NV weed laws have nothing on me.
Honestly, this is a first for me. I've always prided myself on my ability to pretend to get along with others.
I could have been on my second lucrative divorce by now, but nooooo, I had to be a strong independent woman.
She actually made an event on facebook for tomorrow when she does a pregnancy test, 8 people are attenting so far
Randomize
