I would say the hottest chick there looked like Susan Boyle and the ugliest like Bea Arthur
Nice use of current day folklore
I was 10 minutes late leaving for lunch today because I couldn't lose a boner. It is impossible to tuck it when your shirt is tucked in...gotta quit facebook stalking hot chicks at work
did the hipsters beat you up because you are more ironic than they are?
Professor used "ROFL" while grading my paper... Do I even go to a real college?
Fuck the gym. I just shaved m'cooch and my pants now fit looser.... Dont judge me.
you are the best fuck buddy i could have, all the others get feelings and morals involved
Please tell me you saw the asian lady with the medical mask on cutting her lawn with scissors.
New major. Tourism Management. I dont know what it is but it sounds like something all the stupid slutty failed business management majors do.
It's a 2 hour train ride a 7 in the morning, of course we're bringing alcohol
It's like the sisterhood of the traveling vaginas over here
I spent the money she owed me on enough magnum condoms to make a blimp. Damn right I'm going to make the best of it.
If I'm going to risk life and limb to wear a Wings jersey to the Garden next week, the least they can do is win.
And the most would be ending up in bed with one of them.
And the last thing I remember was you in the bed with the german guy screaming "wrong hole" I laughed n passed out
Do you think telling guys I'm majoring in magic is a good pickup line?
so i went to the bathroom and my thong was on sideways... i guess that solves the mystery
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