I'd do that. But we would need storm trooper helmets.
She told me she was a cowboys fan... I told her it was a waste of a perfect set of tits
At one point during the moaning he reminded me of Forrest Gump
We have nothing in common but the sex rocks, would it be awful to develop a drug habit just to have a topic of conversation?
the line at the liquor store is out the door, and students in line are high-fiving like crazy...i love college snow days
know what the best part about malls are? standing on the upper level and boob gazing
just lying in bed drinking beer with a straw waiting for motivation. why?
We talked him into tasing himself.
I used puppy pads next to the couch for her to throw up on....
being pregnant is like rehab
Well. Your father was, shall we say, privately surfing the Internet when he found a video of you and Kevin. This was on a very public website honey.
By the way, Kevin! OMG good catch honey!
I really feel like I should slow down on the getting hammered. I told a bartender on "Taco Tuesday" that a $3 margarita was too expensive. And proceeded to have a $70 tab.
It was bad. U were calling my cat "kittiano" and playing her like a piano. Way too drunk my friend.
Fuck you, i'm all jacked up on bananas lets go somewhere
I sent him nudes while he is at work because I am an evil human being.
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