If facebook stalking was a job I would totally pown it
I just put out an orange level terrorist threat on her punani
My mind says no, but my body says yes.
What does your body say about chlamydia?
WHO ATE OUR COOKIES WHAT THE FUCK THOSE WERE GOURMET
woke up in Sigma Chi. In his room. they are iniating pledges right now. Holy fucking shit mother of pearl.
i got excepted to unl lol
You mean "accepted".
just ran into my gynecologist at the liquor store... i think she's found the source of my problems
you woke me up at 7 am banging on my wall.. what the hell
thats the international knock for joint time
My econ prof just gave me a shot glass because I was the "randomly picked" winner of the lecture. Ties into our supply and demand lecture, supplied with a shot glass, demand a thirsty thursday
She kept sniffing my sweater and tried to guess what type of detergent I use.
am i gonna have visuals on this?
you are gonna see the trees puking up fireworks and ninja pheonixes will shit rainbows and fire
I know how I'm going to make my fortune.. designing an icepack made specifically for the vagina.
I'm trying. I feel like we're trying to have sex with fruitcake. dry and boring.
the wedding party just walked in to the song eye of the tiger. i'm getting drunk.
This Asian instant coffee I found in ur kitchen is like crack. Who knew I could feel my heart beating in my asshole after one cup of this happiness.
Randomize
