Once you see the odd facial expressions and noises a guy makes while he is furiously beating off on top of you, it kind of puts things into perspective.
OMG - This guy with a mullet just told me - it wasn't a mullet - but his hair dresser layered it wrong. It's so walmart in here. I hate you.
he gave me an orgasm. multiple times. the weird stuff he did in middle school is now irrelevant.
Maybe he just has a boisterous penis
Fell asleep in bio again. Sometimes i feel like college is just one really expensive nap.
I get drunk and say inappropriate things... you get drunk and sleep with inappropriate people. it's what we do.
apparently 20 random guys watched the process of me being carried on a mattress through the dorms
Dude give me 4 good reasons we shouldn't trade girlfriends tonight
He pointed at some girls and said "I'm gonna have sex with them girls over there", and disappeared.
Nah, this is the University of Tennessee. She'll get the clap, and get busted for having pot in her dorm by spring break. This time next year she'll be part-timing at a community college as a nursing major. So predictable it hurts.
That's how I like my men: traumatized and crying in a ball
I told him I felt we were at the point where if I saw him talking to another girl, I'd probably choke him out. So I guess you could say things are getting serious.
Two words: blizzard sex
Sorry your girlfriend got you a valentines present and you forgot to get her one.
How long will your dick be dry?
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score one for mom.
Randomize
