He muttered something about having just washed he sheets, then demanded I give him all my quarters.
i just ate that cheese stick that was in my purse from last night.
he passed out on the stove with a cup in his hand. yes the pictures are hilarious
Day 3. Will have to postpone job hunting by a month. May have blown out my knee. Was sunburned on Friday. Now look painted red. Still alive. All worth it.
The lady next to me at the airport just baggage checked a six pack. She is now my hero.
By the way, I got bored last night and just started putting my balls on every object in your room. One at a time.
After Thursday my breakup "don't screw anybody out of respect" month will be over and I will be set loose. My pussy is purring with anticipation.
No, I don't just love you because you have big boobs. I just wouldn't visit as often.
But he does seem to be getting proper humping etiquette down. So there's progress.
His flight is delayed. Mother Nature is delaying me from sex.
He was hammered and shot his pistol into the lawn. Next thing I know sheriffs are at our house with M4s. He likes to party
Dressing as mugato from zoolander Halloween you may want to be the hand model. We can get you a fish bowl filled with Clementine Vodka and soda you can put your hand in.
i was asked to be gay of honor by three different girls and NONE of the groomsmen at any of the weddings is open to experimenting. i mean whats the point then.
I feel like 20 angels jizzed in my mouth. This cupcake is DELICIOUS!
Just found out a shooting happened in our parking lot while it was closed this morning. So thaaaaaaaaats fun.
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