i wonder what megan fox's vagina feels like.
Heaven soaked bacon.
And secondly i just said i'd pay ten dollars to have sex with you
No, that was before the police came, but after the hooker.
i would totally change schools right now just to be that new girl everyone wants
OH GOD PAJAMAS ARE SUCH A HARD CONCEPT RIGHT NOW
He violated my cat. I was not impressed.
I just watched a guy pee from a second floor window onto the line of 100 people waiting to get in.
I feel like his dick looks like a decorative autumn squash.
She sent me a map and directions for a booty call. In a park. Give me reason not to marry her.
I just feel like you're using me for sex.
I'm glad you finally understand the context of our relationship
All I know is I got on a table at late night and sang gotta go my own way
They got mad when I cut the pizza with an x-acto knife. Oh well, more for me then.
I think that all guys are assholes, some of them just have less assholeish qualities that we accept in our lives and that we can look past enough to deal. They have to be a pretty special asshole.
I was driving around a golf cart with a keg in the back before I got caught by the cops. First slow speed chase ever
Don't remember anything. Melissa just said I kept saying welcome to the bat cave
Randomize
