he quoted Bring It On. It's over.
Leave Me Alone
At least least me cry on your voice mail
Drunk lesbians having an argument about their realationship isn't as hot as I imagined.....
I've decided the third guy that I slept with is who I lost my virginity to...
I walked in and saw him spread eagle on the couch beatin it, while he just pet the dog that sat there and stared. mom was pissed
I took 36 pictures of my lava lamp. your weed wins.
Spent fifteen minutes in the car thinking i was psychic before i realized the cd was not on shuffle
But I REALLY want to hide my crazy for as long as possible with him so he'll date me.
You are an awesome peach made of glitter.
What's the blow job-backrub exchange rate these days? I've got some killer stress knots
THERE ARE LEGITLY 4 SEPARATE BITE MARKS ON MY DICK. WHAT. THE. FUCK.
Legitimately*
Go fuck yourself
got laid for being an eagle scout again. 4 more and ill have all my merit badges.
I just thought that if your brother was ever going to invite me over again, he probably shouldn't catch me fucking you in his bathroom.
That’s the third time this month he’s hooked up with a girl by telling her it’s his bachelor party, and he’s not even dating a chick let alone engaged.
If work found out I was using THEIR paper to write Karate Kid fanfic I'd never hear the end of it.
Randomize
