With such a small dick you'd think he'd try to make up for it with some sort of personality.
Does having sex in the men's bathroom on the boardwalk count as having sex on the beach?
So I ate yogurt with the back of my toothbrush. I feel like I've officially been initiated into college.
Straightened my pubes. My dick looks like John Lennon fucked Gonzo.
My body has become completely dependent on Text Twist. I can't poop without it.
Could someone please kill snooki before she contributes to the gene pool.
where's my purse there's an important taco in it
We got the idea to smoke under his bed because, and I quote, "it'd be just like going camping"
I spent part of my valentines extracting candy hearts from a woman's vagina. The entire time I was thinking "this job pays for my Mercedes. This job pays for my Mercedes. This job pays for my Mercedes."
Woke up this morning with my period. Saw a commercial for the beginning of Shark Week. I see what you did there, Mother Nature. My pad's off to you.
Some nights you just end up digging your mcdouble out of the trash and eating it. it happens.
Would you be so kind as to inform your husband that my truck is forever cursed by mashed potatoes and it's his fault.
I have peed in a lot of sinks
Blueberry probiotics greatly increase to the masturbation experience. Try it dude. It’s all the rage
Well the cops were called after the kid fell, but we saw 4 cute guys from our window while it was going down, so it wasn't all that bad.
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