Its like the long john silvers of colleges, I wouldnt even go there to use the bathroom
she was so "full of love" from watching twilight that she came over and gave me a handjob. when does the next movie come out?
She went off on a twilight/new moon tangent before we even got back to my room. i had to jump the ship and pretended to pass out on the sidewalk.
She just told me she blew the waiter in the bathroom. Should I still leave a tip?
Just watched a guy puke off his bike. Beyond impressed. He didn't even swerve
Just break the ice by asking who had to take plan b this past semester
She was shaking her boobs and I was so high all I could think was "breast maracas"
On my way, five mins. Is the line long? Do you think they will they hold a pumpkin at coat check?
after giving head I just always feel like I need like. ice cream. as both a means of getting the lingering sperm out of my mouth, and a congratulations.
Remember that girl that we found passed out in the dorm study room under a pile of money and jimmy johns wrappers? She's standing right on front of me.
If I was banging all the guys that people think I am, I'd quit buying batteries.
Omg I just woke up. In the hallway outside my room. I know you had something to do with this
The amount of guys I've turned down for you is disgusting... You better love me.
Walk of shame through Chipotle? Check.
I'm a history major and he's the descendant of TWO presidents. Did you really think I wasn't going to sleep with him?
Randomize