Hey, don't feel sorry for me, the two girls in front of me just ordered 18 dollars worth of taco bell. Life could be worse.
Just kicked a guy in his penis in order to win a dance contest on Bourbon....desperate.
she was masturbating to a video of herself masturbaing. She's a keeper
We're all in the kiddie pool on the porch. Fully clothed. Watching porn. With my manager.
She sat on the stairs and yelled sex positions at us. I don't remember if we went along with it but judging by the beer and condoms I'm thinking yes.
I've never been to a "going away to jail" cookout. do we bring a present?
His penis is small and he doesnt like Harry Potter. HE HAS NO REDEEMING QUALITIES WHAT AM I EVEN DOING HERE
I inhaled my own vomit, how was your night?
They sleep with other people as long as there is no oral. Logic and reason were thrown out the window a long time ago with them.
The first thing we did this morning was see if we could see her barf in the prking lot from the roof. We could. It was in 5 spaces.
I just need to stick to one night stands and delete social media
eh, I feel I'm heading for a breakdown and I need to get it out of the way before I start writing that lab report.
Oh Jesus our whore days are numbered
Hi, I put a dog in your house, I hope it's yours.
God yes pancakes and booze sounds like the best night ever.
Randomize
