you can SEE the outline of a pad through her jeans. there is no way
It's one of those mornings when I woke up thinking that i really shouldn't have hooked up with my ex boyfriend's girlfriend just to prove a point.
We can add pilot to the list of people who's lives I've changed...with my penis.
If it makes you feel any better, karma just served me up a big dose of fuck you.
Free tacos and bad night are never used in the same sentence
The cougar has a calendar on her wall of when she can give topless handjobs again. I pity her husband.
I think I'm going to give him a welcome back to single life blow job
His mom walking in on us having sex was probably the highlight of the night
He's like a hurricane
a drunk, sexist, hurricane
Willing booties have sort of a tractor beam for me.
is that a dick in a sweater?
She unfriended me four minutes after we fucked. That must be some sort of record.
Dad smells like hangovers and 65 years of bitterness
He said he would get me a helmet and bedazzle it with my name and address so the cabs would know where to take me
This girl was in the river screaming that someone didn't love her anymore...that's when the guy in a kilt claimed her...
Randomize
