so last night was fun and all.. but you might want to get tested
I cannot find my penis.
i'm trying to reconcile what i did last night with who i am as a person.
On my way, I hope you have alcohol for me to blame stuff on...
walked into the kitchen nd asked my mom what smells like tuna she replies" your sister" now i cant eat tuna...EVER!!!
There's a lady carrying her kids toy animals in a crown royal bag. Mom of the year.
Well regardless of where or with who you will be blacking out and i will be pouring shots down ur throat like a baby bird
so i EARNED it!?! i EARNED dying alone with cats!!?
That would be a mascot riding an ATV at a semi-professional hockey game, if that doesn't sum up how I've been I don't know what could
Just had my first american. He tasted like freedom.
I'm going to give you the best blowjob of your life. And yes you can use my mom's printer.
I can't believe I'm coordinating a threesome at work. My productivity is at an all time low.
The most awkward thing in the morning is seeing your teacher's dick right before you go to his class.
there's no judgement here...i was recently just fingered in my dorm hallway while having a conversation with 5 people.
Grandma keeps pulling a bottle of captain from her pocket and spiking people's drinks.. She just yelled "I'm DAMN HOT to be a grandma!" .. I LOVE HER.
Randomize
