We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Just got a script for 120 vicodin with 6 refills. I feel like michael jackson.
I could make treat bags
hey just checking if u still hate me for sleeping with your sister?
Im so ripped right now that i just filled the almost empty bottle of choc syrup with milk and drank it straight out of the bottle. It was on pointttttt.
Coming home soaking wet at three am and trying to convince the front desk man that we came from the library might have worked if I wasn't also roaring at everything.
It's amazing the difference a day and 2000 mg of antibiotic make. Nine days to go.
I really want to go out tonight but part of me wants to be able to honestly tell the judge tomorow that I didn't
Would it be safe to assume you're the one that left my front door wide open and left yourself a trail of jaeger drops to find your way back?
Seriously, do normal people actually get work done being this hungover? No wonder the economy's in the shitter
I wish someone would just come knock on my door and fuck me already so that me and my stuffed animals aren't the only ones who see my amazing spring break tan. I'm not getting skin cancer so I can just sit here abstinent.
She's the worst person, but the best naked person
He played with my boobs the whole time we watched Scott Pilgrim and then started invited others to play with them too. It reminded me of how my mom gives out my french fries without asking.
Dude for real though, we gotta stop getting hammered and kissing gay guys.
I CAN ONLY BE THE BIRDIE ON YOUR SHOULDER WHO LEADS YOU INTO BAD DESCISIONS
I remember sitting in your lap naked saying I don't want to be all looks while you gently rocked me back and forth
Randomize
