I think she heard me call her a fat skank. But she was to be fair.
last night i was so high that when a homeless person asked me for a dollar, i responded: dolla dolla bill ya'll.
Is there some kind of disinfectant spray people use? Why would anyone want to eat ass??
Dude I gave him a bj because he was upset about the NFL draft, if that doesn't lock it down, i don't know what does
I told him that all frat guys do it... it was that easy to get him to go down on me.
You have more facebook pictures than most towns have people.
If my bosses could see, smell or hear me right now they would understand why its a horrible idea to keep the office open sundays
I just took two shots of Burnerts out of a ladle. Get here now.
First sunburned tits of the season. And it's only April... I feel like it's going to be a good summer.
don't act like you've never hung your towel on your dick after getting out of the shower
Thank you for caring about my cervix.
We peed together in a dark alley while holding hands. That is a bond that can never be broken.
You thanked your mom for the gymnastic lessons so you could do a keg stand
If you keep giving me that glorious dick ill bake you some cookies
I just used a bag of jelly beans as an arm weight...I'm not sure what to think of myself
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