He lets me throw up in him even if i do it mistakeily- erica talking about the toilet
I'm not saying we can't have sex tonight, I'm just saying we have to work it around Lost.
I haven't shaved in at least a week, he said "obviously neither one of us was prepared for this"
I don't go on dates. I watch tv and play with dicks. dinner is a situation.
First if all, whoever designed penis shaped ice cubes is clearly daring me to shove them up my vagina
Her face just looks like a massive mistake. That's the only legitimate description I can say about it
I hope my shame shaped pee stain outside your door goes away soon.
I don't think tequila will soothe the spots where my tonsils used to be.
No. 70% of the female population would find them attractive. The other 30% are lesbian and even they would appreciate them for their strong bodies and athletic capabilities.
Pain in my heart, regret in my vagina
He took initiative. Dragged me into the kitchen and did me on the stove....while it was on! And then we made nachos.
So what's your itinerary for Amsterdam?
Show up, get drunk, get laid, try not to miss my flight home.
I think pants incapable of making pants work
Gameplan: If the cops show up, find a potted plant to hide behind... It's worked before!
Speaking of dumpster fires, your ex tried to add me on Facebook
Randomize
