When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
omg... punch me in the throat... I am about to lose my mind with my parents.. I'm not saying I agree with the menendez brothers.. but I understand
I just saw an old lady yelling at a dead pigeon for leaving the oven on.
she's bipolar. she literally has TWO facebook pages. one for each personality. this. bitch. is. crazy.
I've seen people win free drinks for a lot less dude, no need to drop trou on a piano.
Maybe you need to change your pickup move. The "hey check these out" titty flash gets you the wrong kinda man.
I never thought I would have to get vodka suctioned out of my ear
I may have tried to encourage people to play a new game I invented last night. I called it Super Quarters. Like regular quarters, only using an AA medallion.
The guy I brought home last night made a speedy escape while I was in the bathroom. The only trace I found of his flight was a lone sock on the stairs.... It was like a whorey low budget Cinderella
I assume some self respect is too lofty of a gift idea
I slept with a Brazillian Man, That's why I'm Watching The World Cup
I gave his daughter swim lessons and in exchange he sold me an ounce. I feel so accomplished.
Ugh. My life is a never ending cycle of bad decisions and taquitos.
You're an adult now and it's your vagina. You should do what it or you wants.
After returning from the hospital with lock-jaw from getting tackle at the game. Some naked chick busted out of his room and hit him with a devastating haymaker to the jaw because he wouldn't have sex
Randomize
