They threw me out of the bar because I was arguing business ethics with the owner of th bar
i just looked at the calendar to see when spring break is and literally stopped eating
Worst PDA I've ever seen. She even licked the mustard off his mustach
I poured myself a glass of chocolate chips at some point during the evening.
You fell out of your barstool, I tried to help you but you said if I got any closer I'd be drinking my meals through a straw, So there you sat.
Look. You've gotta stop making this about you, and make it about my vagina.
sorry
why?
oh you didn't look in the living room yet, did you?
Fair enough. Everyone has some guilty pleasures. Yours is yourself
Two shots of gin says this is gonna be a sloppy lab write up.
i'm covered in glitter and body paint WTF
We're showing the video later bring pizza
Mostly what I remember is someone saying "raise your hand if you're too turnt" then raising my hand and falling
It's 9:07 in the morning and I am so hungover right now I'm about to take the kids I'm babysitting to mf'ing Popeyes bc that's all I want in this world
Also, your girlfriend apologized to me about yesterday. That was nice of the cunt.
I think everyone at the office can tell I'm dehydrated
you mean still drunk
I've heard it both ways
I've just realized that today's rations have consisted of turkey bacon and jack Daniels.
Randomize