Why are handjobs necessary in class?
I saved him in my fone as special pumba. he was just pumba but then he found me drugs
well after he sqeezed a zit off his forearm i got the hell outta there
there's a sign at taco bell and it says "bacon and ranch make everything better." it speaks to me.
i finally watched harry potter... a tad unrealistic if you ask me... i mean a ginger kid with 2 friends?
Please please please tell me that is not a pringles container full of pee that your little brother just got a hold of.....
I stole another quarter from the bathroom. I'm slowly getting rich drinking here.
Straight up if I get stuck with her I'm going to drink myself into a prison cell.
The bachelorette party was all fun and games until the strippers came. AKA you guys.
I apologize for chief "dances with dolphins" sucking on your friends foot
We can just chill or day drink or smoke or watch law and order marathon or play just dance 4 or watch a movie or go to the movies or play hide and seek or hug, so many options
The DJ was throwing glowsticks into the crowd and managed to smack one guy in the face with them
I'm up in my room and I just saw a naked guy sprint out into the streets from my mom's party downstairs
I'm the catering manager, it's not my job to stop 2 teenagers from fucking in the bathroom. I couldn't bring myself to stop that sort of young romance anyway, that's what I pay you people for
We probably shouldn't have humped each other in a stairwell for an hour. that was probably my bad
I'll just say I told you so at your funeral
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