Your noise violation report contains the word "five-some"...wtf happened in here?
he then started listing things that have been up his butt, never drinking in boys town again
My mom seriously just told me my insurance company pays for rehab. In an email. I expect a real, not just us joking, intervention coming on. I'm not accepting a "lunch date" with that bitch.
I had fun. Till he melissa etheridged my ass and came to my window.
I thought you'd have died of alcohol poisoning years ago! How'd you get my number?
Besides the whole peeing blood for a week thing, it was the best sex of my life.
Just a smidgen more estrogen and shed be golden
She's got a legit dose of dude going on
No kidding. All she needs is a cheek full of chewing tobacco and I'd have fucked John wayne.
remember when I told you about my grandma asking me about my sex scars? Less comfortable than that
NO I WOULD NOT GET A GUMMER FROM A GRANDMOTHER
I'm just sayin. If your gonna cheat go for someone TOTALLY different. Fucking her twin would be a waste.
I just screamed IM THE CHUPACABRA and jumped on his dick. I need to evaluate my life choices.
Listen, I bought the coke that got us those free drinks, okay? Show some respect.
He yanked my breathe right strip off in the middle of me riding him.
I smell like heartbreak.
Tequila and sloppy rebound sex?
How did you know?
after the ketamine those signs on the bathroom door had little meaning to us
Randomize
