No, I'm a firm believer in "Swallow or it isn't love."
Decided to write a book called "girls don't poop and other myths I wish I still believed in"
If I saw her on the street and didn't know about the two of them, I would think the only way she'd ever find love was if she somehow found her way to middle earth and an orc took her in
went to the bathroom to piss, saw puke in the toilet thought wtf i dont remember puking, then turned around to find a chick i've never seen before passed out in my shower.
you yelled then hung up at the girl on information bc she could not pinpoint your location and tell you how to get to dennys
You are mentally unprepared to be exposed to my degree of perversion.
That kid who fell through your coffee table is here. In a toga.
Bonus points if someone shits their pants. Only 1/2 bonus points if it's you
Bonus points are bonus points regardless
Marshall is naming all the elements of my face. I love science nerds.
At some point, it turned less into sparring and more into tough guy dry humping.
Also if i get drunk and start crying about the elephants you all have my permission to abandon me.
You got banned for life from a $30 a night motel. What are you doing with your life?
After she got off the phone with her mom she sprinted down the block screaming "I'M SO GOOD AT BEING A HUMAN!!!!!!!!!!!!!"
You can't go around chasing people and screaming JUST LET ME LOVE YOU. We're in a public place.
There is a dude with blue hair and a samurai sword and another dude dressed as Dead Pool. I daresay standard social conventions are not applicable in this environment.
I called plan parenthood at 407 am... Guess I was thinking ahead
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