nothing as in nothinggggg kills the mood for me is when a girl with 4 cm nipple hair
just saw a girl with a lower back tattoo of the boondock saints prayer.. i will marry her
his Mom's staying with him so he asked if I'd go over and fuck in his shed. he said "it's a really nice shed"
just stole 2 cases of forties from some freshman in the woods by pretending to be a cop. that ten dollar spotlight is really turning a profit
Your philanthropic work just got me laid, thanks dad for naming me #2.
i am going to show so many millionaires my nipple
I just horrified a large group of people. Congrats on dating me.
You brought us all personal gifts you had stolen from the party and bellowed "hoes hoes hoes, clepto Santa loves you"
Dude, I think shitting blood should be a cause for concern not celebration that you had a great night.
Must say, as a couple, she and I are thrilled that our pretend lesbianism has paid off.
whoa whoa whoa, you're saying I shouldn't post pics of you balls deep in a southern hottie?
You left your hot dogs in my dresser again
the fact that I've been his fuck buddy for a year, and I'm pregnant isn't bothering me. the fact that he didn't tell me about his girlfriend does.
Dude, don't beat around the bush. We're fucked and you know it.
If you can throw 105 mph it’s mandatory that you’re hung.
Randomize