Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
Last night I apparently send my boss a picutre of my boobs. On the bonus part I got a raise today. So I just want to thank your parents for naming you Jeff cuz if I was not so hammered last night I would have sent it to the right one.
I put it into a sports analogy for him: there are three teams in the league- friends, fuck buddies, and dating, and the fuck buddies roster is full, pick an alternate team
official worst smell ever. a used condom that has gone through the dryer.
Well i just learned hong kong is a country...thank you olympics
If we were unicorns we would fly together. Like in a pack. A pack of flying unicorns.
Ps I don't think it counts as being open minded if you didn't know he was missing a leg until you had already started making out.
I rode on his Vespa around Florence and fucked him in an empty train. It was like a way sluttier version of Lizzy McGuire
So. How about you can get tequila certified...
Sex in the moonbounce later?
This is why I love you.
I was fed cake in bed and then was pinned down and ridden till I came. And then fed more cake. I'm going to marry Brad. I'll put money on it.
"This must be what Jayden Smith feels like all the time"
10 shots in she's sitting on the floor using the open dishwasher door as a plate to eat her "life giving" pizza.
Remember that pair of super cute shorts I pooped in? I miss those 😔
holy f. i broke my toe giving him head. how does that even happen!?
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