He said i was a degenerate twofaced catholic slut and a grade a bitch. Quite complimentary really. i guess i shouldn't insult the red wings
how am i supposed to spank it to a shakira video when she looks like she is doing the robot?
she called my cock the "semen sword" and then we invented a position called excalibur
You spend 45 minutes trying to convince that pregnant girl you were with all night to have sex with you cause 'the worst had already happened.'
you started keeping track of only every even numbered drink you had
He said I was trying to make the bouncer dance with me AS he was throwing me out
Safe to say I relapsed into my old chatroulette drunk flashing days.
Hey guy that stepped on my foot, don't slap my ass to apologize.
Mother fucker, I knew it was bad when you tried making out with my car window
Selling our snow shovel to buy more beer. Not your brightest idea.
Last night turned out to be an expensive trip to your house between the ticket and the plan b. (Well I haven't gotten that yet)
I just got winded making my bed. How do you think the workout plan is going?
Hillary said in her victory speech "We're gonna come together". I've got a lib-boner.
I love that they love me even though I might not exsist, its kinda like Im God.
Is it good porn? Or is it more of that fucked up Cabbage Patch Doll porn you made us watch
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