I am not having having sex with guys at the moment.
I can pretend to be a girl if you want. I have a tongue.
You even been so high breaking up weed with your fingers feels like surgery?
Worst relationship ever. Keep in mind I've dated two married chicks and a Mormon.
In hindsight, buying 4 different kinds of vibrators at once may have been a little overenthusiastic of me.
I don't really see how asking you not to cum on my face or hair makes me high maintenance
These shoes are way too nice for a walk of shame. Its how I keep myself in line.
Dude, you chugged an entire bottle of tomato sauce and got us free drinks for the night. No way was I gonna stop you.
Topless bubble bath with a lesbian is debatable as a gay experience.
Sidenote: do you recall your "give me the d" chant
He made the Waffle House lady get me out of the car. This isn't a joke.
Just remembered I railed lines while holding a puppy
also new logic of mine : I fuck a Scottish kid , Scotland national animal is a Unicorn airgo I've come close to fucking a unicorns descendent, mother always said dreams come true
I'm questioning my decision to swallow this morning while my stomach was in hangover mode
All of my friends are hooking up and here I am, the lone asexual, looking for someone to eat these tostitos with me.
Change the sheets & put your dick in the dishwasher. I'll see you in an hour.
Randomize
