Prereq for being on nyc prep: money, bitchy, and a lazy eye... if only you were rich
I just banged two guys while dressed like an angel. I love this holiday.
I was crying hysterically and you wouldn't stop petting my ear and shushing me every time I tried to say something.
I woke up with a black eye, bruised knuckles, wearing women's clothing, in a house I did not recognize, next to a solid 9. Thank you for making 21 special.
She told me she's dating him because his apartment is a block from Taco Bell. I don't know how she's not fat.
Sorry, all I could picture was you jamming your dick into a lemon.
I forgot drug dealers have families, too. Cheers to a sober, uncomfortable, slightly enraging Thanksgiving.
Just had my first american. He tasted like freedom.
I THINK it was the lead singer. Whoever he was, I have his number and his dick was pierced.
It was totally the lead singer.
Dude, half of south Mississippi has seen my taint. I'm not worried.
I just drank beer out of an old Vicodin bottle hoping to catch some residue. That's how finals week is going
Lets get drunk. But not too drunk that I can't work in the morning. But maybe drunk enough so we'll make out
when i woke up with rugburns on the tops of my feet, knees, and chin i was a little confused. and then i remembered i had sex with him in his friends walk in closet.
Just bought 2 liters of wine and frozen waffles for dinner. Is this 30?
i had sex with a girl named after a fruit last night and it was the best thing to happen to me in 2020
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