if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
They threw me out of the bar because I was arguing business ethics with the owner of th bar
Note to self: Not getting laid all weekend makes girls in mondays classes racks seem enormously bigger.
i just went to use the bathroom this morning and I couldn't because there was someone puking in every stall. i'm going to miss the dorms this summer
After we were finished she said "That was like marriage sex". Should I take that as a compliment or insult?
While looking for an apartment, I've realized that the way I rate balconies is on the "how easy would it be to smoke weed here" scale.
What other scale is there?
If you've never been partying there before, take Shae with you. Drunk Shae is like a GPS. She found us the only bottle shop still open at four, a pot dealer, and told us all which subway to take to get home. She'd never been to Madrid before. It was awesome.
Your "dubstep at ceilis" resulted in a random naked guy busting into my room and peeing all over my bathroom
What good is being a girl if you can't terrorize boys with pregnancy scares??
What's clit gel and why is it in my wallet.
He suffocated between her tits, but she didn't notice because he still came.
I'm not gonna swipe right, he has better hair than me. Just no.
I WILL KICK YOU IN THE FUCKING THROAT IF YOU EAT MY FUCKING ICE CREAM.
when I finally sobered up enough to get out of bed this morning I went to talk to mom and forgot that I had TITS written in big letters on both my hands. I love drinking games.
I did not shave my legs to sit at home and diddle myself. He better wake the fuck up and put the fear of god in me!
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