? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
ur dog is so gonna tell on us one day.
for doing what?
for smoking bowls out on the deck while your parents aren't home.
Woke up with feathers in my hair. at work. still drunk. sooo awkward.
It's like sleeping with someone you met at a karaoke bar. It's never okay.
after the first, "yea you like that baby", i quickly remembered why i had stopped having sex with him.
Just saw a drunk guy marching down the strip with a garden rake. I feel compelled to follw him
how was ur day?
this is strictly sexting don't make small talk.
I don't know. What do people who don't get stoned do?
It's a little weird that I'm blowing my wingman.
Sure go ahead and start this 'business' with him...just don't come crying to me when you have to fake your own death in two years
Have you ever got so drunk that you tasted the future?
what is considered shitting yourself?
Like my underwear wasn't soiled, but there was definitely a departure from my asshole.
How's work going?
Boring. I have a cat on a leash right now
I'm just letting you know right now in advance that if I die or go to the hospital or end up in jail tonight it's because your kid sold me mushrooms.
Oh and it’s been a year according to my snap chat memories since I banged your cousin in your sons truck pulled over on Elm St! 😂😂😂😬😳😇
Randomize
